QUOTE CHAT : 26

We have all been there - found ourselves in rain clouds. I don't know about you but I am grateful for those that brought the sun into my life to help me realize its going to be ok. Those people mean every thing during such times. Be one of those in return - pay it forward.

Sometimes I have a controlling issue - where I want results right here right now. I get tense - I am over come with this feeling like it all has to be NOW NOW NOW. I want it a certain way so badly that if it doesn't happen right now in the exact way I picture it - it will never happen. I usually get myself worked up to the point where I can't relax and my mind appears to all of a sudden have no other thoughts then right here and right now. I pick at it like a black head or pimple to the point where I come to have made it ten times worse then if I just would have left it alone. This is something I am focusing on truly working on and getting better at - sometimes I think I am making great progress other times I find myself knowing I have fallen completely backwards. The thing about life is that it has a plan all of its own and what ends up being happens for a reason. I am learning to trust in life - thou its a challenge at times I am loosing my grip and allowing my life to shape form and flow the way its meant to be. What I have come to know the way that ends up being the way how it goes tends to always be better than what I had in mind to begin with - which usually finds me smiling and shaking my head while saying under my breath Michelle Michelle Michelle - when will you learn when will you learn. My answer is most often than not I kno I know...soon soon. THe good news is I am finding less moments where I have to have such talks with myself - but then again when I do have to have such talks its usually due to something major - so in a way I am learning and accepting whats meant to be I just need to work on the big big ones allowing those to work the way they are meant to be.

I have been guilty of this - oh wanting something else or something different or something more. What I fail to realize that I am the master of my own disaster or the creator of my own success. If I don't like the way something is its up to my doing to change it - no one else is responsible. What brought me to this moment is the person who stares back at me in the mirror - I am accountable which means I have the power to change or stay the same. Nothing worse than waiting for someone to make your reality different or your dreams come true. Hold yourself accountable, its thru your actions and choices that take you to the places you end up.

HA....isn't that hitting it right on the nose. Yet if you think about it - it makes total sense...change is being outside your comfort zone - and what causes chaos to disappear is establishing a routine and becoming familiar with the new normal. Once you get the pattern down it becomes a normal way of being - however until you get there its pure chaos. We must be gentl with ourselves while we are adjusting and realize that chaos is going to happen but it won't last forever.

I can not picture my life without the friends that come to mind when I read this quote. My life is more - I am more because I have such people in my life. They are more than friends they are in factor family to me. I smile often when I think of these people whether they are near or far - here or there I am grateful.

I am striving to live this quote. To be gentle with life and those that cross paths with me. To hold my tongue more and speak less. And when I do speak to speak with purpose and meaning. To be someone that is accountable to their actions and words. To be true to myself as well as honest with others. To judge less and understand more. To truly think about things and how I feel about them before responding. To be open to that fact that I have faults flaws and failures - and to realize that without my knowing at times my actions and words hurt others, my goal is to try to lessen these kinds of moments. I will never be perfect and I don't strive to be but I do strive to be gentle and to live a good respected life and to treat others with the same respect that I am in searching to recieve.

I pride myself in always realizing this. Maybe I was born in the wrong era or maybe I have forever been an old woman from the start - the word old soul gets linked to my being alot but the truth is I think it has to do with my ways of absorbing the world around me whether it be people - stories - movies - books - music - media - history I have always been someone that remembers the lessons of others. I observe life and I am good at observing life and applying whatever it is I am absorbing to my own life. One of the very first things I remember growing up is how I didn't want to be a certain kind of person - and I found a link than most common factor that resutled in that person being that way was the fact they relied on others to complete them to fullfill them to make them happy to be worthy. It was all based on someone else that wasn't them. I know that this life is meant to be shared in order to get its full value but shared is not the same as dependent on someone else. I truly believe we must have a solid relationship with yourself - truly know what you want what you need and who you are before we are able to be another - ya there have been people that haven't done this that are in relationships but there is a common ground of them usually not being happy - a feeling of having to settle or at some point in time it ends. I am 32 years old and I have yet to est the relationship that commits myself to another being at least in the eyes that all surround me. What they don't know is that I have been in a successful relationship for 32 years, I have commited to myself and have put in the work and keep putting in the work to nuture grow and get to know that relationship - that person that just happens to be me. And you know what its the best relationship I ever had - its not easy and it still takes alot of work but I know fully well who I am and when and if the time comes to commit myself to another I will be able to share my life and know what I want out of this life because I took the time to truly find out just what that is. And you know what the best feeling in the world is - to be with yourself alone and not even have the thought cross your mind that you are lonely.

I will admit this is something it took me awhile to truly understand, that when I talk badly about others or gossip just what I am slowly losing in terms of character regarding myself. As far back as I can recall I always remember feeling completely awkward and super uncomfortable when I was present when conversation turned to gossip or talking bad about someone not present. On top of that I also realized two other things that when I spoke in such as matter as well or if I didn't speak up and say the right thing like this isn't right... the feeling got worse. I also know full well that when I was in such a position I always walked away less of the kind of person that I always thought myself to be. The saying is true you play with fire you are gonna get burned rings true. Now days I don't feel so awkward anymore because I spend less time in convos that find me gossiping or talking bad about another. And let me tell you it leaves me with a pretty great feeling - as well as when I stand up during those times and say hey this isn't right or that isn't how the full truth. Granted there are still times I find that uncomfortable awkward feeling setting in and at times don't do what is right and I am left with that even worse sitting feeling. Funny how you grow with the years and find you would rather just walk away or speak up then have to live with the feeling it leaves you if you didn't. Live and Learn - and this is one of the best lessons I have come to know and understand. For the person I am truly hurting is my own character when I part take is a negative setting.

QUOTE CHAT : 25

This is a good rule of thumb to keep in mind - it point blank tells you when its ok for you to open your mouth and share something and when its not. Its that simple. And it should be kept that simple.

What we don't realize is that our words how power behind them and once spoken they can't be taken back. We simply need to think before we speak, speak with less words and more meaning. Maybe its just that I am aging or maybe I am just who I am but sometimes I find I am just tired of talking about nothing or talking about the wrong things such as drama topics or gossip. But most of all I am over talking about others who can't defend themselves. I am done hurting others with my words or lack of words when it comes to sticking up for people. I have a little voice that I listen to in my head when it comes to speaking - and often that voice says keep your mouth shut you aren't ready to comment yet. There was a time where I heard the voice and just didn't listen to it - now days I tend to listen because the voice is usaully always right.

I am not here to be a big deal - to be praised - to be loved - to be popular - to be the center of attention - to be thought highly of - to be rewarded. I am here to learn. to grow. to become. to live. to breath. to expand my soul and grasp the simple things in life. To be someone who is honest, understanding, compassionate, friendly, kind, and caring. I am here to grow into the best me that I can be. Whether its something that causes focus on me or not I am here to simply live. If I am learning tough life lessons or basking in the the warmth of the light I strive to fuel my soul with whatever life brings my way to better the being that I am - to strength the being that I am.



The power of an attitude is one the best life tools one can carry. It truly can make all the difference in the world. Because the truth of it is - people that carry a positive attitude more often than not have things work in their favor - not because they are lucky but because they are more open to accepting a wide range of outcomes that happiness can be created and obtained from.

Change is hard. Real change is even harder. What is real change??? To me real change has to do with character traits. Changing the foundation of who you are takes real work - but most often than not the work will be worth it in the end. And I know anythign from living this life its that if you are challenged in big ways you change in big ways. Thou the lessons are hard to go thru and learn from in the end its what launches us forward and allows us to become more. Thou I will admit I have a love hate relationship with change - I am welcoming to it because of the over all outcome it brings to my life, its usually all for the better good for my being.

I strive to be the one that never looks at their schedule. I strive to be someone that always finds and makes the time when they are needed - no second thoughts. For the to do list can wait - people that are important to me that I care about can not.

I go back and forth on this - for I have said I am ok before and wished someone would see past the false words I spoke and then there are other times when I pray PLEASE PLEASE don't see past the words I speak - just accept them. I think its all based on a matter of what I am willing to accept as reality and deal with things vs. not in a position of being ready to accept things that are happening in my life's reality. Truth is thou those that truly know you know regardless - there's no escaping such people - i have a few in my life that can spot my false claims of being ok miles and miles away. It can be annoying as well as a blessing.

My one and only...my person.

She's someone I have known for ages. She's someone I watched grow up. She's someone I caused trouble with - got caught with when breaking the rules. She's someone I have been thru the very worse life can bring with. She's someone I have laughed til I thought my stomach muscles were going to tear apart. She's someone who I have smiled to the point where I thought my face was going to fall off with. She's someone that knows my smiles my looks - there's no hiding from her. She's knows me better than I prolly know myself. She's been my friend my sister my person from day one - the almost six year gap between us was never an issue - whether she was 5 12 18 27 she's always been my most favorite person to be around. Her presence is always the one I seek and need when riding on life's rollarcoaster. She's the one I want screaming next to me holding on for dear life. She has a grace about her that puts me at ease. When chaos surrounds the life I live its her that provides the peace. To explain what my life would be without her - are words I will never be able to find nor ever want to find. I know for certain who I am would not be complete without her. I always use to say some corny line about how you couldn't spell Michelle without the MI from Jami nor Jami without the MI from Michelle. Its just how its suppose to go.

 People sometimes get confused when they ask me how many siblings I have. By blood I have two brothers but I always tell them I have a sister as well. For Jami is as much as my sister as Paul and Jacorian are my brothers. The same blood might not pump thru our veins but in every other way that is who she is...my sister. For the bond we have and share is one that is beyond hard to explain - words such as friend or best friend cannot expand across nor range in depth when it comes to the meaning our relationship holds. Its just something both her and I understand without a word yet still both of us fail at describing to others.  How do you begin to share a story that goes back to the years to a time where we were both just kids - to a time we didn't know even who we were other than Michelle and Jami. How do you try to even find the words regarding the darkness sorrow and hardships we went thru that was filled with suffering struggles illness loss death anger pain tears hurt fears and so much more then times by two - for it wasn't enough to have to go thru it once we did it twice for good measure I guess... The kind of life moments when great loss happens that shatters the world you know and finds all the pieces of who you are tossed in millions of pieces across the floor.  When you are on the outside trying to look in you try to imagine what those moments are like - being in those moments with her and her mom are prolly some of the hardest and toughest moments of my life but yet i wouldn't trade those moments with them for anything. As a result of being in that darkness crawling through that darkness with them my life is forever linked to theirs and theirs to mine.

 So when someones asks me what is Jami to you - well she's everything and more. I have experienced life's lowest lows and life's highest high with her. I have cried with her I have laughed with her. I have learned grown and become more as a result of the life experiences we went thru together. Her face might not be one that I get to see as often as I would like but that's the thing about our connection our bond our relationship - i don't need her to be physically present to feel her strength her support her friendship her happiness her love her encouragement for her sisterhood is written all across my heart all across my soul - no matter the distance that comes between us or the length of time that goes by without seeing her the tie that binds us grows stronger and stronger whether we are together or apart. She never ceases to amaze me - most times I just love to sit back and watch her interact or communicate with others - i love to hear her stories and better yet the stories that many share with me about her. For they all simply fill me with pride and leave me feeling honored that maybe me being apart of her life might even just have the slightest influnce on how she became the Jami everyone knows her to be. I say that becasue I know that the Michelle everyone knows me to be was shaped and influnced greatly with having her as a part of my life. She makes me more and a better person for knowing her and traveling thru this life together with her.

I am unsure why life led us on such a course or how it came to be to find her to be the one by my side. Something I will prolly never understand yet always be beyond grateful and blessed that it did.  For if there was ever a person who knows me without me ever having to speak a word its her. For if there ever was a person who's mere presences put me at east it would be her. A few years ago for her 21st birthday Jami's mom and I made her a book - on a page in that book are the lyrics to a song called I'll be...as much as that song was meant to speak the words for me to her - i know the same words come from her to me...Jami - my one and only, forever my person. my friend. my sister.

When darkness falls upon your heart and soul.

I'll be the light that shines for you.

When you forget how beautiful you are

I'll be there to remind you.

When you can't find your way,

I'll find my way to you.

When troubles come around,

I will come to you.

I'll be your shoulder when you need someone to lean on.

Be your shelter.

When you need someone to see you through.

I'll be there to carry you.

I'll be there.

I'll be the rock that will be strong for you.

The one that will hold on to you.

When you feel that rain falling down.

When there's nobody else around.

I'll be.

And when you're there with no one there to hold.

I'll be the arms that reach for you.

And when you feel your faith is running low.

I'll be there to believe in you.

When all you find are lies.

I'll be the truth you need.

When you need someone to run to .

You can run to me

I'll be the sun.

When your heart's filled with rain.

I'll be the one.

To chase the rain away.

I'll be 



No one owes you ANYTHING

“Everything you want in life has a price connected to it. There’s a price to pay if you want to make things better, a price to pay just for leaving things as they are, a price for everything.” — Harry Browne

During the darkest part of the night, who do you blame?

Do you know who Mr. Browne is? According to Wikipedia, Harry Browne (1933 – 2006) was a free-market libertarian writer and investment analyst who was the Presidential candidate of the United States Libertarian Party in 1996 and 2000. He was also Director of the American Liberty Foundation.

I don’t know what these characteristics translate into or even the kind of person Harry Browne was. I did, however, come across this letter he wrote at Christmas to his then nine-year old daughter. The letter was dated December 25, 1966.

I have shared Harry’s letter over the years with circles of friends and family. The responses have varied. Some have whole-heartedly agreed with Harry, yet some reacted with defensiveness, even contempt, not only for Mr. Browne, but toward me for sharing. Some felt the letter was cynical, harsh, even cruel. There were also those who thought that Harry’s words to his daughter offered them a new perspective on life.

For me, the letter was a great reminder of the expectations we attach to people, outcomes and situations, and the potential blame we assign when we don’t receive what we have desired.

Who is responsible for life’s outcomes? Who is responsible for our experiences?

***

Harry’s letter to his daughter:

It’s Christmas and I have the usual problem of deciding what to give you. I know you might enjoy many things — books, games, clothes.

But I’m very selfish. I want to give you something that will stay with you for more than a few months or years. I want to give you a gift that might remind you of me every Christmas.

If I could give you just one thing, I’d want it to be a simple truth that took me many years to learn. If you learn it now, it may enrich your life in hundreds of ways. And it may prevent you from facing many problems that have hurt people who have never learned it.

The truth is simply this: No one owes you anything.

Significance

How could such a simple statement be important? It may not seem so, but understanding it can bless your entire life.

No one owes you anything.

It means that no one else is living for you, my child. Because no one is you. Each person is living for himself; his own happiness is all he can ever personally feel.

When you realize that no one owes you happiness or anything else, you’ll be freed from expecting what isn’t likely to be.

It means no one has to love you. If someone loves you, it’s because there’s something special about you that gives him happiness. Find out what that something special is and try to make it stronger in you, so that you’ll be loved even more.

When people do things for you, it’s because they want to — because you, in some way, give them something meaningful that makes them want to please you, not because anyone owes you anything.

No one has to like you. If your friends want to be with you, it’s not out of duty. Find out what makes others happy so they’ll want to be near you.

No one has to respect you. Some people may even be unkind to you. But once you realize that people don’t have to be good to you, and may not be good to you, you’ll learn to avoid those who would harm you. For you don’t owe them anything either.

Living your Life

No one owes you anything.

You owe it to yourself to be the best person possible. Because if you are, others will want to be with you, want to provide you with the things you want in exchange for what you’re giving to them.

Some people will choose not to be with you for reasons that have nothing to do with you. When that happens, look elsewhere for the relationships you want. Don’t make someone else’s problem your problem.

Once you learn that you must earn the love and respect of others, you’ll never expect the impossible and you won’t be disappointed. Others don’t have to share their property with you, nor their feelings or thoughts.

If they do, it’s because you’ve earned these things. And you have every reason to be proud of the love you receive, your friends’ respect, the property you’ve earned. But don’t ever take them for granted. If you do, you could lose them. They’re not yours by right; you must always earn them.

My Experience

A great burden was lifted from my shoulders the day I realized that no one owes me anything. For so long as I’d thought there were things I was entitled to, I’d been wearing myself out —physically and emotionally — trying to collect them.

No one owes me moral conduct, respect, friendship, love, courtesy, or intelligence. And once I recognized that, all my relationships became far more satisfying. I’ve focused on being with people who want to do the things I want them to do.

That understanding has served me well with friends, business associates, lovers, sales prospects, and strangers. It constantly reminds me that I can get what I want only if I can enter the other person’s world. I must try to understand how he thinks, what he believes to be important, what he wants. Only then can I appeal to someone in ways that will bring me what I want.

And only then can I tell whether I really want to be involved with someone. And I can save the important relationships for those with whom I have the most in common.

It’s not easy to sum up in a few words what has taken me years to learn. But maybe if you re-read this gift each Christmas, the meaning will become a little clearer every year.

I hope so, for I want more than anything else for you to understand this simple truth that can set you free:

No one owes you anything.

Birthday Shout Out: GIA

I have only known her for roughly 365 days - but I am smart enough to know when you meet someone who is rare and filled with all the good stuff  - the kind of person that is kind - caring and down to earth. You know the kind of people that I am talking about - the ones you meet and you know full well something is just well different - they are a different kind of person that you just don't find each and every day. I am positive only a certain amount of such people are out there - and this girl I believe is a part of such a select few. I am beyond grateful for her friendship and the life lessons she has helped me learn as well as accept. She is bettering the world around her by simply being herself - what a gift she has given so many without her even truly realizing it. And the simple truth is the world needs more people like her in it. There's no doubt in my mind she makes a impact on each person she meets - in the best sort of way.  She surely is a breath of fresh air with a welcoming smile and a grace about her that just puts you at ease. She's one of those friends you are glad she found it worth her while to befriend you.

My birthday wish for you, Gia is to know that YOU are more than enough by simply being who YOU are. That you, Gia matter greatly and the people that call you a friend rely on you in more ways than you will ever know. I wish you endless confidence to keep living life just in the ways that you do,  for your attitude that you bring to life each and everyday inspire people to "love today" and just be.  Thank you for your friendship but most of all thank you for just simply being you.

QUOTE CHAT : 23

Life would be great if we had access to a time machine to go back in time and fix our mistakes or better yet just have a do over. But the truth is if we did everything perfect if we never made a single mistake or find ourselves wishing we would have do this instead of that - well we would be missing out on something even more important than getting it right - we would be missing out on the learning and growing part of life that results in us becoming. Thou we can't go back and fix things we can learn from the past and take that knowledge and growth and apply it to shaping a better today or a better future. Thats the great thing about the future its still in the making it hasn't happened yet so we have this great opportunity to do what we want with it. So ya the past may not be the prettiest thing to reflect back upon but thats ok its the view you are creating in front of you that truly matters.

I know of people that have never left their home state - i know many that have never left their home country and even a few that have never left their home city. I look at this world that we live in - its huge - its massive filled with all sorts of places and people and well I think its a waste when people don't take the chance to explore and discover this world. And when I say explore and discover I don't mean you have to go on some big trip or some place half way across the world - but i do firmly believe that each one of us must live outside our comfort zone - so someplace new and expose ourselves to a different way of life. If we only stay in the same place well - i think we are meant for more.

My grandmother is a tough stubborn German lady - she was always all business she had things that needed to be done and tasks that required her attention. She was always cooking cleaning baking sewing. There was no joking around with her - if you were helping you were helping simple as that. She wasn't what I called the most loving grandma until one day I was old enough to understand her. This woman who I thought was made of steel was not in any way made of metal. Her way of being was a direct result of life handing her cards she really just didn't want to hold and her only way of dealing with them was to focus her drive on things she knew how to do without question. I remember when I was 7 or 8 I walked past her bedroom door and heard her talking - I stopped and realized she was praying and crying in privacy. It was then I realized her determination to carry on - to apply her stubborn hard headed German ways to life but deep down she was gentle soft it was the hard coated layer I only noticed her as. I have learned from her you just never know what a person is battling or what their life is like. After that day I had a new respect and admiration for my grandmother and as a result of that my relationship with her deepened and grew. She was still stubborn and tough but I also knew she prayed for me every chance she got and loved me. Each of us has a life story some of us wear it right on our sleeves others wear it differently - the point is don't judge til you  know their story.

We have all been there - when we are on the start of something new - that time where you reflect back upon your life prior to this new start and time what was I thinking!?!? My life was way easier my life was way better then. The truth is new beginnings usually bring chaos - the unknown and all things new. Its the best worst feeling one can have. I have a strange obession with that sick to my stomach sort of feeling that comes when you are starting something new. Mainly because I know I living outside my comfort zone and am learning a new way or exposed to a different life. I am unsure of the process why it has to be hard before its easy but thats just how it goes. And once you truly know this you can breath a bit more easier. The first miles are always the hardest when you are running. The first day is always the toughest when you are starting something new. Allow yourself time to adjust and have confidence that you will get the hang of it. Before you know it this new beginning will be your new comfort zone and soon you will have to challenge yourself once again to step outside of it.

I know without certainity that we are all connected - the people you have in your life have had in your life and will have in your life are there for a reason. Some reasons are plain and simple and easy to see and know others it takes searching and time others we don't know for years and years or maybe even we won't ever know until we leave this earth. But I am positive you and your being has an impact of each life that crosses your path. I have always had the goal to make sure that I am doing things for the better of others. That my impact is a positive one.  The goal is thou to be real and not fake. To be this person whether you are alone or surrounded by many. I strive to stay true to the core of my being and my most important gift to others is found in the form of how I simply treat them. I know one thing if you make it a habbit of just being you no matter who is around you its easy - unless you are someone who's in some need of changing and growing then well thats a different story.  Buttom line is pay attention to how you treat others it does make a massive impact.

Why is starting something new always a result of challenging goodbye or end? My only clue to why this is is because we are leaving our comfort zone - we are stepping outside and taking a leap of faith without having a clue on how it will turn out. What we forget often is that our lives is a process of repeating such steps. Years filled with taking leaps of faith...whether we are in high school in college in the real world its always happening - we go to school we graduate we find jobs we move we find new places to explore new places to live we leave jobs for other jobs we are beings of change our lives are deeply connected to change yet its the very thing we all fight. New beginnings are change in its toughest form yet its also in its best form. They go hand in hand. Where we find ourselves fighting to hang out and fighting to let go. 

Isn't amazing when we look back at the things that truly transformed us - shaped us are often the events places and people we so badly wanted to change - to make it work in our favor...but they never moved to our liking ended up making us be the ones that are transformed and shaped. Life is a crazy ride...a crazy ride that we only realize from looking back what truly forms our lives - what moments provide the growth we need to become and what it took for us to be well us.

Its amazing how some will judge you just based on how you live your life. What many fail to understand and realize is that we all have our faults our failures our sorrow our challenges our loss our heart ache our pain our tear our hurt...the only difference is how we handle such things. The attitude you bring to the table of life makes all the difference in the world.

If there is one thing I know for sure the very best people are the ones that are a little crazy a little wild a little strange a little random a little different a little in a world all of their own. I welcome these people into my life - for I truly believe they know a secret about life and living it. my advice find as many of these people as you can and keep them forever.

 If there was an off switch to my mind I would love to know where it is. I realize it something you need to work at - controlling your thoughts. Having the power over your mind. Its something I am trying to work at but wow what a struggle it is sometimes. I know in my heart that my soul knows what to do what it needs and wants. I know sometimes my heart may not agree with it and then there are other times where my heart and soul are on one page and my mind on another and then worse when all three are on different pages.  But its true the soul will find a way but often the one that comes in the way is your mind. Learning to shut it off or control it well there is the goal to work at.

 You know what - I couldn't agree more. I have come the point of being utterly ok with this - I have been for some time - if it happens it happens. But I have come to know that me being my one and only is something I am completely at ease with.  I don't feel like I am missing someone or something in my life - I am enjoying this time with myself - doing things for myself - learning things about myself as well as about this life that I come to know that I can do just as much alone that I can with another. I am no longer waiting for that person - if they come great if they don't their lost. I am here to live - explore - discover - grow - learn and become - my life is not less because I am doing it on my own. Its just as full and filling - maybe there will be a day that i will share this life with someone but the truth is my soul is at peace with just being with me. And if you ask me - i think thats pretty darn cool. I think if I were to brag that is a pretty great trait to have to be okay with just being you alone.

 Well...this would explain alot if this is true.

 I believe we all need a place where we can close the door and be at home - where we can retreat and the rush worries and stresses of life can't follow. A place where we can just relax and rest. I have always been highly into collecting things thru this journey of life to keep in such a home and when I am at my home I am simply at ease and happy to just be there. Surrouned my life's treasures feeling safe and at peace. Each of us needs such a place to unwind from the day and close our eyes and rest.

What I have noticed is that so many are in a rush to be somewhere...I often wonder where that somewhere is...what's so important about that somewhere that people focus so much on getting there they forget about where they are right now in this moment. What's the rush ... the somwhere isn't going anywhere. It will be there - and well sooner or later so will you. SLOW DOWN...Stop stressing...I am certain if you are meant to be at that somewhere place you will one day find yourself there.

I am starting to think this is my warrior song. My theme to my life. Just maybe my happily ever after is just me. And you know what I think its a pretty darn cool amazing person to spend my life with. I think She is someone i will never feel alone with and someone that I know who will always create her own happiness and find her bliss in this life. Being on my own brings me much liberation knowing fully its me who completes me.

I am unsure why some people must test us - why they bring us right to the very edge of our limits... Is it to annoy us? Is it to test us? Is it to force us to change in some way? I am willing to put up with quite a lot but even I know I have my limits granted it takes me awhile to get to them - my advice just don't try to test them or push them. I truly think its the worse thing you can do is take advantage of someone who is purely being nice for the sake of just being kind. Remember your actions and words do affect another - a nice person can be changed after people mistreating them after so long - help change people for the better not the worse.

QUOTE CHAT : 22

 FUNNY - HAHA HAHA - FUNNY. I laugh because well that was me to a T. I would like to think with age that I am growing wiser and it only takes me once or twice to learn something but there are certain things that I tend to fail at over and over again - with no understanding why I have not learned. I can only hope its something that I can one day fully over come.

 If there is one quality I am proud of is the fact that I respect others. And I sure hope its a quality I never lose. But one thing I need to learn and fully do is respect myself. There are certain people I allow to treat me a certain way - and that is as much as my fault as it is theirs because I allow them too. I make up excuses why its ok for them to do this or say that when in the end it simply isn't right. Which in turn is a form of disrespecting myself. I am a strong-will and stand tall with all others - its times that I stand tall when it comes to these select few people as well.

 In the hussle and bussle of life we need to be reminded of this simple task that can make all the difference in the world... ... ... JUST BREATHE.

 I have been told by others I care too much about what other's think. I personally think this is a statement that is utterly untrue. And mainly applies to what they think other's are thinking. For some time now i have been completely comfortable with being just who I am - changing for no one. Take it or leave it. This is me. I have never been a big talker about the real stuff - writter yes and well thats me and will always be me. I have always been one that have kept the respect for others how they feel or try to understand life in their shoes - that will always be me. Relating to understanding someone is not trying to impress someone nor changing for someone. Its simply who I am and who I will always be. I am not here to impress but I am also not here to lecture or preach. People can take me as I am or leave me as I am. Either way I will be just fine.

 I see it all the time - I hear it all the time... HURRY UP. GET MOVING. LET'S GO LET'S GO. MOVE IT. HURRY UP. WE ARE GONNA BE LATE. HURRY UP. I never understood the rush some people are in. I understand there are things you can't be late for but most often than not such things don't apply - people are just in a rush simple as that. It use to drive my friends crazy walking to class with me - or just walking with me in general. You are soo slow - would often be the comment I would most recieve. My comment most often returned was whats' the rush?!?!? Most of us need to simply just slow down. Take our time and enjoy this life. It doesn't last for as long as you think. You will one day run out of tomorrow's. My advice is SLOW DOWN.

 I know one thing for sure you hang around with troubled people you will be up to no good. You have out with good people you will be up to positive things. Its all about who you surround yourself. For its these people who will influnce encourage inspire and support you. They will be the people that see you for you - esp when you are being less of the person that you are capable of being. They will be the ones that lead you back on to the right track when you are lost. They will be the ones that pick you up when you are down. Having people that see you - truly see you are like having a lifesafer. Always there to pull you from the depths of the ocean of life - a candle in a tunnel of darkness. Reminding you of who you are and what you are capable of. Thank God for these people. Thank God.

 There comes a time where you just have to take a leap -forget all the reason why it won't work and just do it. All it takes is one reason to make it worth it - to get you to put yourself out there and try. Regardless of the outcome or what will happen as a result it is worth a shot. I have no intention of hearing reasons why I shouldn't do something - esp when they come from others. I am focusing my attention on the reason why I should do something!!!

Where would we be if we didn't have such people in our lives. Who would we be? Everytime I have found myself knock down or broken to pieces by life these amazing people appear they help me up and carry the pieces until I can put it all back together again. I am forever grateful to have such people in my life and as a thank you in a pay it forward sort of way I hope to be such a person in other's life. For we all need to be the candle and the flame.