They can be the right person for you...you know without question yet it just doesn't work...and I think that has everything to deal with timing. Sometimes I think well I know I have met the love of my life - it just didn't work at the time we met or the time we tried to be together. Do I think our story is over...before it ever truly began...ya thats a question even i don't know the answer too...all i do know is that right now its not our time...maybe someday our paths will cross again maybe they won't maybe the one I am suppose to be with is still out there...or maybe its meant that is just me...either way i am done worrying about such things...because in all honesty i am just happy being me and being just with me. My life will not be any less if such a relationship is never found in my life.
Why is it that people are afraid of admitting such things as they are sad, they are in pain, they have demons, they have darkness, that their life isn't perfect. If there is one thing I have always tried to do was to make sure those that I know and care about know full well thats its ok to not have it all together...that they don't have to be perfect for me to accept them - undestand them or care for them. We all have our own darkness our own demons - there is nothing to be ashamed about for having them. They make us human - don't be afraid of the dark for its only in the dark we can see the true light to follow.
For the longest time I felt I was failing if I moved on - if I gave up...That I was less of the person that I am if I did such things. I am still learning I will say that... But I do know that the only person I was hurting by doing such was myself. I was selling myself short and missing out on so much in life becasue I was so busy trying to hold onto something/someone that was long gone. Letting go to me is the hardest thing to do...granted sometimes its easy and I can do without a thought but other times it takes all that I got to turn the page and let the chapter end.
How would you ever know you are having a good day a great day a best day if you didn't have a bad day crappy day shitty day to compare it too? How would you know the value or worth of something unless you have felt and seen both sides of the coin???
STOP IT... NOW... Life isn't that bad...suck it up and see the positives and not focus on the negatives. LIFE IS WAY TOO SHORT to be Complaining.
What's the point of living if we arne't doing the following...growing. learning. laughing. smiling. having fun. loving....if we stop doing those things...whats the point. I hope i NEVER reach an age where I find myself not having fun.....
I have gone thru certain times in my life that I know I will never fully recover from - I truly will never get over...Loss a profound loss from ones life is something I think none of us fully recover from loss we simply learn to live a new normal without that person no longer being there. For I have found there are still sharp painful moments of remembering that it all comes flooding back...The wound always remains just with time the edges are less jagged.
There have been moments in my life where I found myself thinking and feeling to the point of almost being overwhelmed I CAN NOT DO THIS... I MUST HAVE THIS....THIS PERSON MUST BE IN MY LIFE...turns out with time life slowly helps you let go and you know what I have come to realize I have found laughter happiness and love without such things and people even thou there was a voice in my head telling me that i wouldn't be able too. And the best feeling of all is realizing that I was able to let a few things go in life and go without a few things from the start - iwas proven wrong and it was prolly the best thing that could have ever happen. Its pretty liberating knowing full well the needs in your life arne't in fact everything to your life.
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