Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Since June.

Mom went from having nothing pink in her closet to having too much to chose from.
Our black lab, Kobe has become very protective of Mom, barking and not wanting anyone to come close to her on his watch.
We know how to speak in medical terms (fyi this doesn't fully mean we know what we are talking about).
We now look at the calendar in terms of how many chemo treatments are left.
We have felt the compassion support and love from people close far and half ways around the world.
We have found ourselves wrapped in warmth by such caring people while we walk in this unknown darkness.
Found out that Mom can sleep just about anywhere if she has a blanket and pillows (the boat, the camper, the car...just because she's sick doesn't mean she has to miss out.)
We now have excuses if we get pulled over for speeding ---but she has cancer... however this doens't work if she's not in the car with you.
We have a fridge that is never empty because of food constantly being dropped off.
Paula has gained control of the remote over Mark... this doesn't happen.
Thou she's sick with a fever my father still claims she can sit in a tree stand.
Three kids shaved their heads to lead their mother into the darkness in hopes their bald heads will reflect light to guide the way.
We no longer wait to live.
We take part in cancer walks events and runs (and have shirts that say Paula Power)
We cherish simple everyday moments we have with this lady we call Mom and Paula.
Paula has been told the meaning she has given to so many - some in this life never hear such things first hand.
We look forward to chemo treatments because its a social time to visit chat and laugh.
We have met such people like Dr. Addo, Stacey and the rest of the staff at Phoenix Mind and Body and not just think of them as friends but as family.
Paula and Mark have connected back in touch with friends and family.
We have learned to see the gift in today and not wait to say and do til tomorrow.
We have found ourselves walking in the darkness of the unknown but realize just how much life means now in this moment. We live with our soul now. We know the beautiful life holds especially in the darkness.

Most of all thru all the unknowns we wouldn't wish for a do over or a different path. We are growing and becoming as people and as a family. There's a meaning to this journey. There's a reason. And I believe its because since June (Paula) my mother has never been more beautiful and stronger. Since June life didn't seem like we were truly living it... Since June have found we finally have started.

2 comments:

Mom said...

Thank you for writing such a meaningful and beautiful piece. You are able to put into writing just true and strong feelings. Dad and I truly appreciate what you have been writing. It takes a lot of strength and thought to do what you are doing. We are very proud of you - even if your writings are always tear jerkers with laughter. We love you very much.

Mom

The Thorsrud Family said...

WOW! I am just loving all of you guys! I found this link on your facebook! Michelle, you and your family are inspiration. I did hear what is going on with your mom, and you guys have so much hope, and hope for others! I AM PRAYING FOR ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys are an inspiration for so many people, and I see the LIGHT of God in all of you! Bless you! Especially when you guys are knocked down, so hard, and you are PRAISING HIS NAME! God is so good, and this life is just our test run. There is SO MUCH HOPE!!!! And people like you bring people to Christ, and I know there are angels in heaven who are singing for all the new Christians you and your family are bringing to know, love, and trust our lord and SAVIOR, JESUS! AMEN!!!!! Great writing, I'm praying!