How often do we let the past dicate our future. How often do we not let the past go and let the future in. To me reading this well just makes plain sense - when we hold onto the past it takes power over our present and our future. Granted I know it hard thing to do let go - of the if only's and the should have . would have . could have . I hate living with regrets but sometimes you just have to suck it up and live with it - learn from it - grow from it and let it be a part of your story and move on. Easier said than done I realize. Thats the question at hand why do we let the past have so much power over us? Why isn't the most common thing to do is learn grow and apply to the future in a positive way? I hate it when the past has power me - I realize I am the one that allows it too but I don't want to be control by yesterday - I don't want my mistakes failures heartaches pains to be what shapes me and defines me - I don't want it to be know for who I solely am but rather just part of of the many stories that come together and becomes the book of who I am. I want the power of writing the book of my life not my yesterdays.
We have all been there - we have all felt it. That moment when you realize something is wrong and you don't speak for the right. Whether it was watching someone being bullied in grade school - talked badly behind ones back - watching an act of abuse or act of theft. How often do such things happen and our reaction is to turn away or pretend we didn't hear or see it. Why. Why. Why is it so hard to do what is right esp when we stand alone. Maybe with age I have just gotten fed up or maybe I have just gotten more grounded in who I am and what I stand for. Whatever it is I have made a promise to myself to stand for what is right to be someone's voice if wrong is being done to them no matter if I stand up with many or I stand up alone. Because that feeling of turning away or pretending I didn't see or hear well its a feeling that does not sit well with my soul at all.
We all need such people in our lives - to make us realize that we can do better. we can do more. To simply inpsire us to reach further - expand the walls and break thru the glass ceiling. Because we are capable of some much more - even when we think we are not. WE ARE. What a blessing such people are - even if we don't realize at that given moment.
This is the quote I need to read then re-read then again and again and again when life is challenging me. I need to fully believe in it - trust in it and realize this simple fact.
I know there are 1,000's millions of people who get up each day and end each day - carrying out and living their lives all the while during with a struggle in which most of us know nothing about. So many of us are quick to think some people have it easy because of this or that and all the while that person may be battling some of the biggest demons. Don't judge people just like don't judge a book by its cover that the true time to see what its or who they are all about before you start thinking this or that.
I remember the very first time I was truly left to venture life alone. I will admit I gave myself quite the pity party - but I realized that I couldn't pass this adventure up even if it meant I must go on it alone. I was 26 - 27 years old and I was flying across the ocean - well across the world to Australia where I did not know a single soul. It was the hardest change and challenge of my personal life adjusting - i was homesick but you know what i got thru it and it became the best experience of my life. Just an experience that I know crave for more just like it. And as if I couldn't possibly top that - I explored Australia alone after meeting friends I still went off on a vaca across the downunder alone. It was strange at first just having me as my travel company but I found out that not only didn't I mind it - I LOVED IT. Yes there were those moments where I wished so and so was here but they didn't last long and I was off exploring again. It was the first time I got to know and spend time with the person I truly am when no one else is around. I got to know her and I built a relationship with her and to be honest I think she isn't all that bad in fact I like spending time with just me. Ya it was scary at first but it turned out to be just what I truly needed and longed for. Never again will I be scared to walk alone and I highly suggest you spend some time with yourself too - figure out and know who you are it does something special to ya.
When was the last time you felt it??? How long are you gonna wait til you feel it again?
My advice...don't wait too long!!!
HA. Is that not the truth. How my mind plays things out and how life usually ends up are two different worlds. Some days the way I see it in my mind is better - its the way I wish with all my might it would be but most often than not after time the way it actually is is not only the way that is should be but the better way. We should have to allow life time to play out.
This would be taking the high road...and well sometimes it not in any shape or form easy!!! There are times I wish I could be just as low as the person - give them a dose of their own self. But from experience two things always happen one: it doesn't sit good with my soul because I am being less of a person than I truly am and two: it always back fires in a way that I am always the one that gets burn. Its not easy thing to do at first but in the end its always the right thing.
Some of the best things in my life stem from what appeared to be the hardest moments. I look at what I accomplised the places I have gone the things I have done - and I am baffled at what I have completed. The places things experiences and moments I would have missed out on if I let the frame of mind "its hard" stand in my way. I dare to be more fearless.
I am done. I am simly done trying to fit in. To be put in a box that I can't fit in. I am willing to meet people half way but I am unwilling to now do it just the way everyone else is because they want me to fit in. I am not here to be noticed - to be a trend setter - I don't strive for such things but being forced in a space that I can't fit into not only robs me of air but of life. So take it as it is - take me as I am but I refuse to be someone that is made to be fit. I have tried too long to make myself fit and I don't intend to feel that pressuse ever again. BE YOU.
Nothing and I mean nothing heals me the way nature does. Nothing eases my soul and brings me peace than spending time outdoors. My restlessness disappears my clogged thoughts become clear and when I thought I couldn't breathe because of the challenges and struggles that lie before me one inhale of nature and my lungs are full. I will come back time and time again to be healed and I know thats where I must go when I have wounds that are fresh or deep. Thank goodness for what surrounds me and my ability to be at home when I am surround in nature's beauty.
This is something I am learning greatly about and something I am learning to adjust my thoughts and feelings around - that just because I do this or say that doesn't mean its given in return. Its my choice with what actions I make and what words I use and granted as much as I would like to see it being returned I must realize its that person's choice and what good is it to make someone or force someone to do something. It is a struggle I know to learn such lessons but with each time that passes I am getting better and better and now have more of the attitude of its not what I get in return I do it as a reflection on how I feel about someone or allowing the kindness that I have to be shown no matter what is done in return.
To me there is nothing worse than just doing just existing. Sometimes I get very restless with myself when I realize I am doing just that - when I am wasting moments in which I could be exploring discovering growing learning and becoming whether it be in life or with my self. This world is full of chances to live and not just exist.
Sometimes I will admit I get down on myself because I haven't done this or completed that - but what I need to realize is that sometimes life takes detours - it has delays and its not about how we stuck to the plan to get there but allowing for those side stops and different paths to take us there - because sometimes most of the time its the better way to truly go. So stop sticking to a certain plan and keep in mind instead a certain goal.
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